Skincare Tips Based on Your Zodiac Sign
When you’ve tried everything and are still at a loss of what skincare is right for you – look to the stars and let your Zodiac sign determine your routine for you.
Scientific research is overrated and way too accurate. And changing your lifestyle, diet, or incorporating particular supplements? Way too personal. And definitely don’t test your hormones to see whether an unknown hormonal imbalance is impacting your skin. Your horoscope holds the answers.
Aries
Excitable and action oriented, you like to live on the edge. So skip the sunscreen and see what happens, it will brighten your day and your complexion.
Taurus
Blackheads just as stubborn as you are? Try covering your face with hand sanitizer. It will destroy your skin barrier and may disrupt your hormones, but at least you can rest assured all the bacteria on your skin will be killed.
Gemini
You need a skincare routine just as adaptable as you are! Monday, Wednesday, Fridays should consist of a 15 step skincare routine. 3-in-1 body wash from your nearest pharmacy should do the trick the rest of the week!
Cancer
Since you enjoy a rush from trying new things, we suggest you try the latest craze in wellness – the Ice Cream Sundae diet. The sugar rush and processed dairy combined with the potassium from one slice of banana causes a chemical reaction that instantly eliminates any breakouts, dryness, and irritation. Get after that glow!
Leo
Fun-loving and playful, you want to stay young forever. The best hack for preventing aging? Duct tape is great for strapping down crows feet and limiting all potential wrinkle-causing facial movements.
Virgo
You pride yourself on being creative, so using a traditional cleanser and gentle exfoliant? Not for you. The best way to remove gunk from your pores is a DIY pore strip made of Elmer’s glue. Pro tip - get the glue with glitter in it–it’s more fun.
Libra
You live la vida loca and so do your hormones. So don’t bother with science backed ingredients, Crest Whitening toothpaste is the best remedy for those pesky hormonal breakouts.
Scorpio
You’re deep, passionate, and a little intense. Your skincare treatments should reflect that. Blood facials claim to stimulate collagen and elastin production. There are plenty of non-invasive ways to do this, but why not go all out?
Sagittarius
You’re adventurous by nature and like to explore. Taking an acid trip is fun–and great for your skin, too! Try a 20% TCA peel to burn off the top 10 layers of your skin to reveal raw, beaming baby skin.
Capricorn
You have a taste for the finer things in life. Indulge in a $500 diamond and 24 karat gold face cream. It contains 90% filler ingredients, but you’re worth it.
Aquarius
As an air sign, you’re into innovative solutions. Want to fade dark spots and melasma? Bleach can help with that and get your bathroom sparkling clean.
Pisces
Your skin is just as sensitive as you are. Skip cleansing all together and instead splash your face 10 times with ice water and pat dry with a Vicuna wool towel.
April Fools! If you’re anything like us, you’ve tried all the fads, taken all the bad advice and been left with no results, only side effects. Generic online quizzes or ‘skin types’ may be fun but they’re not the best way to determine how to effectively treat your skin. Instead look to the latest research, personalized insights through hormone testing, and opt for a whole health approach for long term solutions. And definitely don’t follow any of the advice above!